Dog toilet paper!

Im not sure yet on weather I am a fan of supermarket specials. Sometimes you can walk through the supermarket and buy everything you need really cheap because it all seems to be on special, and some days you can walk out saving nothing because the opposite seems to be happening. Or you can walk in to the supermarket and completely blow your budget because things are on special only if you buy 2 or more of them.
I am a creature of habit and routine. I get payed on a Wednesday, therefore I do my shopping on a Wednesday and this past Wednesday was "Wacky Wednesday" (now we all know that i shop at Pac'n'Save). My first thought was "Ok I'm glad i got here early because it's going to get busy" Then i started to hope that things I needed where on special. This week, it was a mixture of everything. Things i needed were cheap, somethings i needed were not, and because my list this week was not very large i had a little money to treat myself (although i did end up over spending, but it was only buy $8.) One thing i treated myself to was Kleenex Cottonelle toilet paper. It was 18 rolls for only $4.99 and even tho i didn't need toilet paper this week, I did not want to pass up on the offer of having soft toilet paper for a few weeks.
When I got home, I started unpacking the shopping and putting everything from the bags into their piles before i put all the items away - Fridge pile, Pantry pile, Freezer pile, Bathroom pile etc. I came to the toilet paper and as I put it in the bathroom pile, Jahshia looked at it. She gazed at me with the look of "are you serious" smeared all over her now 4year old face and said to me in a tone that matched her face perfectly ...
"Dog toilet bum!!! You got Dog toilet bum!!!!" (she calls toilet paper toilet bum)
As i looked at the big packet of paper, there smiling back at me was a picture of a golden lab pup with his paw on a roll of paper. It dawned on me that she must be thinking that this is toilet paper for dogs. I had to somehow explain to her that the dog on there is not because its for dogs, but because it would be rather wrong to have a picture of a person sitting on the toilet, wiping his behind on the packet.
Maybe next time i should just stick to my budget brands.

Mischief Number 3

My Mischief number 3 is often a delightful bundle of cuddles.
She is a joker, a cheeky little tike, and a performer.
This afternoon as I sat on my bedroom floor helping the kids paint, she was swinging on my neck giving me cuddles. I ever so kindly (because that's how mothers always talk to their children ;) ) asked her to stop swinging so I could help with the painting. My request was responded with a huff and an immediate down-trou and waving her bare behind around while making "amusing" noises. As i looked at her waving behind, I came to realize that even tho her Father has not been in her life as much as he had for the other two, he has defiantly influenced her in some things.

Devin is too cute!

Lately Devins School teacher had mentioned to me that when she is reading with him, he often looks at the book sideways and is rubbing his eyes. She mentioned that this could be a sign he that the poor wee man might need glasses.
Today I took him to the Doctor to get his eyes checked. Lovely Doctor lady preformed a few eye tests on him, one being "cover one eye and tell me the letter" test. As she covered his eye she asked if he could please say what letter he saw. He with his 5 year old mind looked at the letters and said ...
"bah, dah, rrrrrr, hhhh, mmm"
I had to hold back my giggles, I could see him trying to hold back from doing the jolly phonics actions that go with each letter.
But good results. At this present time, there are no concerns from the Doctor.
Devin is too cute .... at times.

Ps - He is not cute all the time and he has just reminded me off that. Jahshia was getting annoyed because he was taking too long on the toilet. So she came along and flushed it while he was still on it. He got upset, but not at the usual "you got me all wet" but because he could not count the number of poos he had done. It was a rather long meltdown on his part. That's just gross!

A sheepish day

I picked Devin up today at lunch time when his Kindy finishes. We arrive home and as i finish closing the gate and turn around to walk down my garden steps, i catch a glimpse of the neighbours dog heading down the side of my house. It was only for a split second then his backside disappears round the corner. My neighbours dog is a large medium size dog, fluffy coat of a light cream colour. He often gets out of his create during the day and roams in my yard. I was not the only one that noticed the dog, Devin to noticed it, but not the same way as i did.

Devin "Mummy there is sheep in our house"
Mummy "No honey, that was the neighbours dog"
Devin "No Mummy, it was a sheep"
Mummy "The neighbour dog is shaggy and could look like a sheep sometimes"

He just left it at that, he wasn't going to push the subject.
Madison was falling asleep in my arms, so i unlocked the house, took her to her bed then proceeded to go to the window to shut the curtains. As i went to the window, i took a glimpse outside to check on the dog and make sure he was ok, but i got surprise. Standing in my backyard were 3 sheep.

"See mummy, sheep are in our house."
"Yes Devin, you were right, there are sheep in our yard"

I tried to take photos of the 3 sheep, but alas, these sheep where somewhat sheepish and took off the moment i appeared in my yard.

After Madison woke from her afternoon nap, we went for a walk. An hour later we arrive home to find our backyard invaded yet again by sheep, but this time there were 4. I managed to get some photos this time before i herded them back down the driveway to where they belong.

Although would it be wrong of me to have one for dinner? The thought of roast lamb was very tempting.

Taken from my bedroom window.

Steering me down

Leaving to go back home.

Peshie found a little lamb,
Munching on some toast,
She shaved it down & wrapped it up,
It made the perfect roast!

Unknown illness and a walking Mischief

One Friday morning, i woke somewhat still tiered, but that is not unusual for me seen as the sandman often makes a bypass round my house and avoids putting me to sleep, or even keeping me to sleep. Not even the adult version in the form of little blue pills brings on the much needed cuddly sleep creature. But this is all irrelevant and inconsequential to that story that is about to unfold.
I got up and dealt with the day at hand. Went through the motions of getting the mischiefs their breakfast and dealing with the days normal issues when you have children.
At 1pm i bundled the mischiefs in the car and ventured out to do a few things before we need to arrive at a 1 year olds birthday party. The party was good, and the mischiefs had fun. At 3.30pm i start gathering everything and think about heading home. By the time i arrive home at 4pm im starting to feel a mild twinge in my throat. Only 3 hours later when the mischiefs were in bed my throat was becoming rather swore, my head was starting to pound and my chest was getting a twinge of pain. By 9pm i was lying in bed not really wanting to move, by body was starting to ache.
I was forever waking up that night finding it a struggle to breath. At one stage i had to find a bucket to have beside my bed because when ever i had a sip of water it did not feel like it would stay where it was meant to. What on earth could come on so fast and so viciously? When the mischiefs got up at 7am, i was unable to move. I was in a fair amount of pain from head to toe. The only thought i had was this is the flu, i have had the flu before and this was very much what i had felt like. Except this was slightly different. The aches and pains and the mildly blocked nose with a sore throat where all things i knew with the flu, except this not knowing if i could hold water down was something i had not experienced with this virus. Could this flu i have be the dreaded H1N1 Swine flu? Sometime that morning my Branch President of My church had shown up to give me a blessing. While he was there i rung the urgent doctors because i wanted to know what the difference was between the "normal" flu and swine flu. The nurse on the phone wanted me to come down and get checked out because she could tell that i was having difficulties breathing. So the hunt was on to find someone to look after the mischiefs while President took me to the Doctors because i was clearly in no state to drive and take myself. We found someone (amassing Esther and her awesome hubby Moo ... They need a post all of their own in order to give them the right gratitude that i have) so off i went. Luckily because i had trouble breathing and chest pain i was seen right away. But come to think of it, i don't think they believed me because they took my temperature (i was already so dopped up on panadole which not only is a pain killer but it brings your temperature down) and it was high but not extremely high, and even though it was painful to breath, my blood was still getting a very good amount of oxygen in it. They looked at my throat and saw it was red, so gave me some antibiotics and sent me on my way. Didn't tell me why my chest hurt or why my entire body felt like i had been thrown out of a 10 story building. I wanted to know what exactly was wrong with me. But i was far to much away with the fairies to even to think about asking what they thought was wrong with me before i stumbled back out the front door. Later that night Esther and Moo turn up and find me in my bedroom struggling to breath. My chest was hurting as much as what labour pains feel like and im not talking about those beginning stages of labour pains, i mean the full on take your breath away tears flowing down your face sore because you opted to not have drugs. I then got checked out again by someone, this time it was paramedics that Ester had called for, but they had said that i was ok and didn't exactly believe me that i had a flu.
Wow this is turning into a much larger post than i had anticipated. So cutting a long story short, I was extremely sick. Im not one to complain when im sick and it takes an awful lot to knock me off my feet. This mystery illness did. Was it the dreaded swine flu or some other nasty greebly that found its way into my system.

But during this ordeal, Mischief number 3 - Madison, decided to put one foot in front of the other and try out walking. She is now walking all around the house and enjoying it immensely. Although sometimes to much as she get over excited and falls down. That is when i to fall on the floor with fits of laughter.

Three walking mischiefs ... what ever shell i do?

A much needed catch up.

It has been almost 2 months since my last post, in which i am sorry about, but unfortunately i have had a some rather serious things to deal with that i did know where coming but they still knocked me for 6 when they happened. So, scene as it has been almost 2 months i feel it is time for a much needed update to my little life.

Well first off, an update of Jakob and I. Many of you know almost exactly what is going on in that department because the justice system is oh so kind to estranged wives and protecting them form the shame and embarrassment of the ordeal, so they did not grant name suppression which in tern landed him a story on the court page of the Otago Daily Times. That did really great things to my self esteem, self worth and dignity. If you don't know well then that's good, all you need to know is that is currently taking up residence in the Otago Corrections Facility aka Milton Hilton with a sentence of 2 years 4 month, which means his first parole hearing is due in February. Its odd that they can call it a Corrections Facility when all they do it lock you in a cell for most of the day and offer little if no support to correct the behaviour that found you locked up there in the first place. If they wanted to change the name from Jail to Corrections Facility then they should change the structure of it so its more fitting. If they are not willing to do that, then you may as well just keep the name of Jail. Political Correctness drives me insane.
Even though for the majority of this year, i have known that he was going to Jail, it did throw me somewhat. He did get longer than i had thought, but then again "do the crime, do the time". And that is very much his thoughts on the matter as well. It was still hard seen as i had been trying to keep what has been going on to myself, then suddenly everyone who reads the paper now knows the story. Although not a completely accurate version of events seen as the defense was made up of a twisted, vindictive, disgrace of a woman who doesn't deserve the title of Woman. I can not wait until Karma gives her a call and bitch slaps her around. Although that is a whole other post to vent about.
His court day happened on the 12th of May, only 2 days before our 3rd mischief Madison was to turn the beloved 1 year old. Since then i have been floating around trying to keep myself together. I have my good times and my bad. I've been swinging from wanting to sleep all the time to not even my little blue pills the doctor gave me are even helping me fall asleep.
I know that if you do the crime you have to do the time, but he was still a great support for me. He would still come over and take the kids off my hands so i can have some much needed me time and he would help me clean my house and also give me money when i needed. But now due to the justice system my support has been ripped away from my children and i and left me with very little in that department. There isn't much justice in that. The lest they could have done was give me some more support seen as they took my main support away. I had to fill out a form the other day for my parenting group, it asked for my next of kin - someone to contact if something was to go wrong. I sat there and almost cried and sadly turned to the group leader and asked "what do i write if i have no one?". That felt rather depressing.
I would say that i am going through the motions of grief. Right at this point i am going through anger. I am very angry right now and especially at Jakob for putting me in this situation. I never signed up for this. I signed up to be married for time and all eternity, not to be left to be a solo mum of 3 kids with absolutely no trust for anyone else to ever come into my life. What happened has left me very broken and i just seem to think that if my Husband can do what he did, then there is nothing stopping anyone else from doing it. Now I'm starting to ramble and that's not a good thing when i am in this mood. So anger .. I am angry, but i am not a vindictive person, so i will not do anything long lasting with that anger, for example burn all his cloths that he has left here. That's tempting, but i could never do that.
Due to Jakob being in Jail, he is about to declare himself Bankrupt. I spoke to my lawyer the other day about this and she is doing some research into how this will affect me. That is stressful, but then at least it will stop all the debt collectors from bombarding my house with phone calls and letters demanding Jakob to pay them.
The mischiefs are doing ok. They do miss their dad and love getting phone calls from him.
When Jakob went away i sat Devin down and i told him that Daddy had to move away for a little bit because he is in big boy time out. I thought he would not understand the term Jail or even Corrections Facility but i thought he would understand time out. I have also talked about the difference between big boy time out which daddy is having and little boy time out which Devin has. Calling it time out has saved me from embarrassment. As little kids are they do like to talk a lot about what pops in there head and Devin has told a fair few people that his daddy is in time out. To the people who do not know his situation, time out can mean anything, they would not immediately presume that he is referring to jail.
I have also put pictures of each child and their father beside their bed, so they don't forget what he looks like. I will never run their father down to them, no mater what has happened or will happen between Jakob and I. It is highly unfair to do so.

Other aspects of my life ... well there really isn't much to update you on that seen as there isn't much else to my life than looking after the kids and dealing with all that has happened.
I will try to post more often. My Wii may get repossessed due to the bankruptcy so ill need some other form on mind numbing entertainment. Not that posting is mind numbing, but playing odd games on Facebook is.

Mummy Devin day

A of the beginning of this school term, Devin started morning Kindy, and Madison started Pre-school 2 days a week. This means that on Monday and Wednesday afternoon, is Mummy Devin time.
Being a solo mum, i have found that Devin has taken a hit the hardest. He is not coping as well as the girls, so i thought it rather important that i have that one on one special time with him.

Today was the first day that i was able to have that special one on one time with him, (the other days have been filled up with me dragging him around to meetings or such forth), which he asked to go to the park and i thought, why not. there is nothing stopping us from running around the park together.

Here are some pictures of the afternoon.

Start at the dinosaur park
(the favourite park of my siblings and i when we visited Dunedin)

Then we went to the beach

It was such a fun time. It was really good to just chillax and have fun with him. Lately i have been to wound up with responsibility that i forgot that it can be fun to.
I can't wait till the next time Devin and i can have fun again. I think we both need it.

Lets play a game - Answer

Very good. I loved reading what you all thought. Erika - air, rather clever. You are the closest person because you did think very obviously. Of course air is going to be one of the things that are in there.

This box has come about due to having to take drastic measures to stop the mischiefs from destroying our house anymore. Im not overly stressed about it because im going to change all the wall paper anyway, but its not a good habit to have the kids get into.

This is what is in the box .......

This is why they are in a locked box.......

I have tried many other approaches to prevent this from occurring but they have all failed. Most of the crayons have been eaten by the little girl mischiefs which is a relief seen as the crayon seems to be the choice weapon of war against my walls, but i still feel it necessary to lock all the pencils away as well.

Often i would put the kids to bed with the illusion that all the crayons are safely in the top draw, only to wake in the morning to find a new colour sprawled through the already artistic mural they have lovingly created.
So enough is enough, everything i can find that they will use as a decorating tool for my walls, will now be locked in this box.

Now lets hope that Devin doesn't start learning how to open the lock.

My Super Hero

There have been a couple things later that have been weighing me down. Bothering me somewhat.

Thing 1 :
Im in debt buy a fair few hundred. Depression and lovely little plastic cards do not mix well, especially when you have a fair amount in the bank because its just before all your bills are due. And also it doesn't help you sort out your budget and i made a couple of huge mistakes like misjudging the week the mortgage came out and forgetting to put money aside one week for the next. Lets just say that the amount was over 500 but not yet near 1000. Debt is stressful. When Jakob found out i was in as much debt as i was, he jumped to it and found me a way out. I don't know exactly how he did it but i do know it was completely legal, But he just gave me all the money i was missing to make ends meet. I almost cried when he gave it to me. It was such a relief to finally say i had enough money again. Although it did come with a mild lecture about staying on top of things. Which was understandable and trust me everyone, im not making those mistakes again. I promise. Super hero to the rescue number 1.

Thing 2
I hate vans. I loath them. I unfortunately own one. One unpleasant thing i have found out about my van is that when it is wet, it fish-tails. Its not stable in the slightest. Going around corners i have to be at 20kph at the most and just because im driving straight, doesn't mean im safe. I've found that if i drive over any of the road markings, it can send the back of my van swaying and swerving. Its scary and i hate it. It only happens when it rains, but this is Dunedin, we are not known for our wonderful hours of sunlight all day. It has been hot lately but today i woke up and our house was in the clouds. I do not feel safe driving the van and when the kids are in the car it really worries me. One thing that has bothered me (but i have gotten used to it) is Jakobs impulse buying. Since we have been separated, he has ended up owning 2 cars due to impulse buying. At first i thought what a silly thing to do, but now im so thankful that he did. Because he did, i can now sell my stupid van and use the money to pay off Jakobs ford and then he will give it to me under my name. It means ill have to learn manual but thats ok. Without that car of his i would have had to trade in and then payed off the rest of a new car which i don't have the money for. The ford is the youngest of the cars and would be safer to drive. Super hero to the rescue number 2.

Thing 3
With 3 little kids its hard to keep up with housework. This whole time we have been separated, He has still come over and helped clean when i needed. One time i went to church and came home and found my house clean. I was amazed. He mentioned the other day that he wanted me to pick a day when i would go out for a while and he would come round and clean my house. Now that would be bliss. Super hero to the rescue number 3.

Im so thankful for all that he has done for me lately. Sure he has made my life complicated but he has also taken some huge burdens off my hands. He has shown me that even though we are not together, he is still there for me. This last weekend he has spent a fair amount of time with the kids as well. They absolutely love and adore their dad. I still love him lots, Well as much as an ex-wife/estranged-wife can/should/whatever hmmm.

Proud of my little girl.

Yesterday was a milestone in Mischief Jahshias life. She went the Whole day, from when she woke up to just before she went to bed, with no nappy on. She had no accidents either. I also know though that just because she went yesterday with no mistakes, doesn't mean she is toilet trained.

Oh how i can't wait till all my Mischiefs are toilet trained. No more nappies will be bliss.

Messy mess mess mess mess mess messy

All i can really say, is that my life is rather messy at the moment. In the marriage front, its a mess. There is so much to clean up and i don't feel that all the damage has been completed as yet. But thats all i am saying on this matter. Im going to try and get back into blogging again. There is so much more to my life than a messy marriage. So i aim to find what else my life has to offer and blog about it. New year, New beginnings. Lets hope this year will be much better than last. Although so far, its not much better.

3 Mischiefs and a Supermarket.

Wednesday is a pre-school day. Wednesday is pay day. Wednesday is the day i go grocery shopping. Its the perfect day to do it.
The plan yesterday was to do my shopping as usual and take Jakob as well seen as he has no car. But when i pulled up to his house, something had happened and he needed my help with something else. Which ended up taking up all my time and i never got to go shopping. But its ok, i really needed to help him and that was more important than shopping.

So due to my lack of shopping yesterday, and the lack of basic food stuffs such as milk, butter, bread etc, i endeavored to take all three mischiefs to the supermarket .. on my own. Wow i was insane. Devin ran around everywhere and kept wanting to sit in the trolley on all the food. Jahshia kept throwing things in that she thought i needed and Madison was rather good, but did start crying when Jahshia thought it would be funny to hit her on the head. Poor little mischief, gets all sorts of torture committed to her.
The biggest trial though of shopping with them all on my own, was the part when we got home. You see, i have no off street parking, then on top of that, i can not park on my side of the road.
This is how i executed the dilemma of getting kids and shopping inside...
Step 1 - Get the kids inside but leave the front door open so they know you haven't abandoned them.
Step 2 - Go to the car but leave the front gate shut so no kids can follow you out.
Step 3 - Get all the shopping bags out of the car and put them in front of the gate.
Step 4 - Open the gate and put all the bags at the top of the stairs. Never let the bags out of your sight or else mischiefs will put sticky fingers through them and open all the things they are not meant to open, so the next steps are to prevent that.
Step 5 - Take all the bags from the top of the stairs down to the deck.
Step 6 - Take all bags from the deck into the kitchen.
Step 7 - Quickly get all the things that need to go into the fridge or freezer into their appropriate places. Then take kids out of the kitchen and close the door.
Step 8 - Go back later and put the rest of the shopping away when the mischiefs no longer need all your attention.

Im getting the hang of this mum thing. Im learning new tricks all the time. Sure i have my bad days but everyone does. But overall i love being a mum.

Dead tooth

About a week ago, Devin and Jahshia where play fighting as they do. Yes Jahshia is very much a girl who loves to dress up and be all girly, but she also likes to play fight. While they were rolling around the floor and the couch there was a rather unfortunate collision between a three year old head and a 2 year olds mouth. After many tearful hugs, and sobbing apologies, followed by a lecture about how we need to be careful, things seemed to go back to normal. Or at least what normal is for this house hold. Later on that night i noticed Jahshia was avoiding eating with her front teeth and grizzled every time she had to pull the lid of her drink bottle up with her teeth. I thought id just keep and eye on it.

And so i did, kept an eye on it. She went back to eating fine and was no longer grizzling about it, so i left it at that. Until this morning.

This morning i noticed that her tooth was turning gray. Not a good sign. So off we trotted to the dentist. We found out that yes her tooth has died and that she has little if no feeling in that tooth. I am so proud of her though. We had to do x-rays of the tooth and she did all that the dentist asked her to do and she sat on my knee so still while they took the x-ray and they got a very good x-ray of her tooth.

So proud of my darling little trouper.

Bad day.

Today was a bad day.

Well the day wasn't bad. I had fun with the kids. Although Madison has now come out in chickenpox, but so far she is doing good. But after the kids went to bed, i feel apart.

I have been trying so hard to keep everything inside, and ignore the fact that my husband is no longer around. And he is no longer there. The man that i was sealed to only just a year ago is no longer there. There is just a someone who looks kind of like him that comes around to spend time with the kids, But the person inside is no longer there.

Devin i think is taking it the hardest. Never underestimate the understanding of a 3 year old. He knows that daddy isn't here so much, he knows he doesn't get to see his daddy as much anymore, he know that daddy doesn't get him up some mornings anymore and he knows that daddy doesn't sleep in mummies room anymore. And hes angry about it. He snobs Jakob when he comes round and he is making life somewhat difficult with his tantrum outbursts of demanding he needs of tv and cookies and refusing to do anything else. Recently he has become more defiant and angery.

Jahshia - Every time someone walks through the front door she screams "Dadad Dadad" and is rather put out if it is not him. She is such a daddies girl and she adores him.

I don't like seeing my kids like this, it breaks my heart.

Tonight was a bad night, i fell apart and cried so much. But tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow i will pick myself up and continue on with the things that need to be done.

Solo Mum

Well i feel that i need to write about this sooner or later, so why not do it now.
It will most likely be a short post, just because i do not want to dwell on this for too long.

Well as some of you know and some of you don't know, for the last month Jakob has been standing at the front door claiming he is leaving. Well On Monday night he finally did. He actually moved out to another house. Not just his mums or a friends for a bit but signed a 3 month lease on a room near the University.

I am trying to look at the positives of this situation because if i dwell on the negative then i become a big ball of blubbering mess that would never be able to get up in the morning.
So the positives are ...

• I can now make MY bed they way that I like MY bed to be made.
• I can now have MY bedroom the way I like it.
• I can now decorate MY bedroom and MY house the way I want to.
• It has forced me to look at my life and the things i need to improve on. Before the kids had Jakob to lean on when mummy was stressed, but now they don't so much, so my kids need me to fix me now. Hence the previous post.
• And lastly - Stress is a very good weight loss. Ive lost all the weight i gained by having the girls, now its just Devins weight i need to loose. And im starting to squeeze myself into some of my B.C cloths (B.C = Before children)

The things that are keeping me afloat at this time is daily prayers and lots of priesthood blessings. Without those, Id fall apart.

I don't want people to think badly about him because these things happen. So please no comments about how much of a jerk he is. I am angry, but anger isn't going to get me anywhere.
We were sitting at the bank the other day, getting separate bank accounts, and we were talking with the lady about Winz and how they see it odd that Jakob and i are on speaking terms. They expect us not to be. And i just said "look we have got kids together. We have to be friends and speak to each other. And we have already done the arguing and me trying to hit him with the car, its now time to be friends"
On Monday night when he was moving, i just fell apart. He was planning on going on Wednesday, which would have been fine because the kids would have been at pre-school and all i had to deal with was him moving. But Monday he came home and said he was leaving now, while i had screaming chickenpox scabbed kids refusing to go in the bath, then when they got in the bath they pooed. It was all to much for me to handle. All i wanted to do was get in the car, drive round the corner, park up and cry. But he wouldn't let me go and stood in front of the car. I didn't try to hit him with the car. I just edge it forward to try and get him out the way. When he left I then spent the rest of the night cleaning MY room and moving things around.

So that's whats going on in the little old life of mine right now. Solo mum.

I'll be better when ...

I have just read a post from an awesome woman who has inspired me to look at my life slightly different and write this post. Thanks

One thing i seem to say to myself a lot is that "I'll be better when ..."
Ill be a better mum when im not so tiered, Ill be better at exercising when im not so tiered, ill be happier when im not so stressed, I'll be a better person to live with when the kids are older and not so needy of my time an energy, Ill be better at cleaning when my time isn't taken up so much by little mischiefs ... I'll be better when ...
I'm forever making this excuse. When i read the post i started to realize that i will forever make this excuse until i decide enough is enough.

Well there are some huge life changes happening right now. Some of you know and some of you don't, and for those who don't, don't worry i am about to post about it soon. Im just waiting for the right time.

So in the light of these new changes i have decided enough is enough. No more excuses because my mischiefs do not need a mother who is full off excuses. Well apart from excercising, i still have excuses there because it is hard to go for a run when you don't have anyone to mind the kids. But my kids need me now to be the better mum, they need me now to be a more plesant person to live with, They need me now not later.

Enough is enough, no more excuses. Its not going to be easy but life isn't easy. I will slip up, i know i will but thats not going to stop me from trying again and again till i am better now because i know that i can be.

I am going to make a little poster and put it on my wall with the saying "I'll be better NOW!!" So every morning when i get up, i will remind myself, enough is enough.

Chickenpox stole my weekend!!

As a mother there are no such things as weekends. I work from about 6.30am till about 10.30pm everyday, 7 days a week. calculate that and its an average of 112 hours a weeks. More than 2 full time jobs combined. For 18 hours of that week, i only have 1 mischief to deal with while the other 2 are at pre-school. Another 6 hours i only deal with my 2 girl mischiefs. The 18 hours happens on Monday 9 hours and Wednesday 9 hours. I consider these days my weekend days. I know they are broken up but its still my "days off". I cherish these days.

Today is a weekend day. Today i planned to do the grocery shopping, buy a present for Ella's birthday on Saturday which the mischiefs are going to, walk around town, do some house work and have a sleep. I was looking forward to today. You could then imagine my horror as i dressed the mischiefs this morning to find some rather ominous blistering spots on them. Chickenpox are going around and my mischiefs did not escape from the jaws of this evil bug. So even tho everyone at pre-school has been exposed to it, its still policy to keep them at home. One good thing tho is that they are not fazed by the ordeal. They are not trying to scratch, they are not sick, they don't have a temperature, they just have spots.
So today we went off to the doctor and confirmed that its chickenpox, then came the fun part ... Shopping!! I needed to go grocery shopping and had to take all 3 mischiefs with me. It wasn't actually that bad. Madison and Jahshia sat in the trolley while Devin helped me get things we needed. We ran into Sarah and Ella at the store. The mischiefs are in home based care and Sarah is the persons house they go to and Ella is her daughter. For a good part of the day Sarah had no children but her own seen as mine weren't aloud to be there. For the rest of the way around the shop all Jahshia was yelling was "Ella Ella". We also ran into Mary and her 2 children Samuel and Rebeca.
Then came the present hunting. I tried to take as little time as possible seen as kids in a toy section is not the funnest thing ever.
Then we went home for a sleep. Jahshia fell asleep in the car and Madison fell asleep not long after. So while Devin sat down and Watched "The Never Ending Story" for the 100th time, i had a lie down. It was nice but not as good as the sleep that i was looking forward to.

So with the Mischiefs with chickenpox, who knows when i will get another weekend day.

I just got a txt from Sarah. Ella has them now to and she is still going to be taking children at her house if parents are ok with it. That means weekends are back on. Friday Devins at pre-school!!

A time for planting.

Over the weekend my mum came down to visit. She helped me a bit in my garden and we bought some pansy seeds. We got some of the rocks that are in my back yard and decided to make a rock garden for them.
Seen as today is a nice day i thought id get the mischiefs to help me plant the seeds in our garden.

We have our seeds and our watering can....



First I spreads the seeds around the garden and cover them up.

Then comes the fun part ....

First Devin waters the garden ...

Then Jahshia gives it ago ....

But then Devin gives her some unwanted help!!

But my garden is all watered now ... hopefully not to watered.
Now the kids will have fun watching their rock garden grow with lots of pretty flowers im sure the will just pick.

Oh so cute

The most cutest thing just happened and i thought it required a post right away. It's also rather funny i think.

Jahshia just came to me and wanted her baby wrapped up. So i proceeded to wrap her little baby doll. As i was finishing, i saw behind her Devin clutching his Lightning McQueen with a blanket. As i handed Jahshia her nicely wrapped baby, Devin jumps up in front of me and says "Wrap my Queen". So i then had to wrap his McQueen - with a little giggle of course.

Lovingly wrapped toys

Random road trips and a 20yr old goldfish

Monday morning i woke and got both Devin and Jahshia ready for pre-school and as i was doing so i was making lists of all the things that i was going to do that day.
Drop kids kids, Breakfast, start doing washing and hang it, clean up house especially kitchen and lounge, sleep if i can, go see my nana at 3pm and pick Jakob up at 4. Nothing out of the usual.
After i so happily dropped them off at day care i received a phone call from Jakob telling me his grandfather only had 3 weeks left to live and he would like to go see him. Family is very important so i proceeded to look on-line for the cheapest flights up to Auckland. His mum was heading up as well but she already had her tickets and his mum wanted Trinity (his little sister) to come up as well. The flights from Dunedin to Auckland where not as much as i had thought they would be but i thought id check flights from Christchurch. As i expected, it was much cheaper for our family and Trinity to drive up to Christchurch. While the kids and i stay at my parents, Jakob and Trinity fly up to Auckland. Jakob would prefer to see his Grandfather before he passes than go to his funeral, which i think if i were giving the same situation, i would choose the same.
So for the remainder of the day i was booking flights and getting us ready to suddenly drive 4-5 hours north. We finally set off about 5:50 and with many stops to feed hungry mouths (especially the littlest mischief), we arrived safe at about 11pm.

We all then got up early Tuesday morning to get Jakob and Trinity off to the Airport for their flight. I was hoping to take Devin in and see the planes but with a lack of parking and time we just dropped them off.

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Our next adventure was to find mgy mums work. She works in a Kindy in Avonhead which isn't to far from the Airport. We found it with no problems and in no time both Devin and Jahshia found fun things to do.

First Devin found the sandpit ...

And Jahshia found the babbies ...

Madison found cuddles.

Devin found frogs (one of his favourite animals)...

Jahshia found ribons and music...

They both found paints.

Then it was time for home, lunch and sleep. Jahshia was so tired she just crashed. but not before playing dress-ups with a pull-up

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Wednesday we got up and got ready to go for a picnic and feed the ducks. It was very nice day, one that was perfect for a picnic. Once we had gotten ready and found my wallet that was loving hidden by little hands, we set off to pick up my friend Pete and head of to the gardens.
It was such a nice relaxing time. I sat on the rug feeding Madison while Pete ran around with my mischiefs. They just loved it and adored him. We then went to feed the ducks. but there weren't that many around but that was ok because the kids just wanted to eat the bread anyway.

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Since we have arrive, Madison has been rather unsettled and feeding a lot. But i did manage to get a few pictures of her and her Auntie Brenna last night ...

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My parents have a gold fish. They got this goldfish when i was 4 years old. Im now 24 years old and the same gold fish is still alive. How you ask. I have no idea but its true. Its not just one that looks the same. Its the actual one. There where 2 but the other one died the other day.